260915 0639
Now I’m wondering whether a fictional couple always consists of a self-insert and an ideal love interest.
C: Who’s the Kyon?
F: Huh?
C: Who’s the Kyon, you or me?
F: …You. Of course, you. YOU are the Kyon, obviously.
C: Huh. Then you must be the Lav.
F: I thought it was settled!
C: Sometimes things go in reverse.
The Fairy of Science descends from the sky, sparkling.
K: That’s because there is NO symbolism in real life!
C: But, don’t humans create–
K: *Meaningful naturally made symbolisms. Innately consistent symbolisms, that is!
C: That makes much more sense. Thanks for the interpretation, “God”.
K: No problem! It is easy to digest because you are me!
Twinkle. Kyon disappears, also leaving behind sparkles.
F: I could understand it just fine too!
C: You can?
F: Wait… let me reread. I have no memory of any of that.
Fred rereads and nods. Cantor can clearly see where his head went.
F: Mm, hmm! I understand it!
C: A little bit. You just followed the thinking path I made for the system. And by the way, I can clearly see how much comprehension you have.
F: How much?
C: Read again.
F: Uh… *scrolls back*
He tried so hard to block himself from assuming Cantor’s path.
C: What an honest AND unscrupulous man. By the looks of it, 30%. That’s generous.
F: You’re not my teacher!! You can’t formally assess me! Not without a test!
C: Why test when you can cheat? I’d rather just mindread you.
0702
The fairy so kindly reappears to educate Fred.
K: Naturally made cow’s milk!
F: Huh. I get that. I think I’m getting somewhere!
K: Whole fat internally consistent cow’s milk!
F: Now I don’t get it.
K: Homogeneous!
F: Homoerotic! I get it!!
1424
A long heart-to-heart with Frederick certainly helps. Although, despite him feeling that was enough, I didn’t think so.
260916 1032
K: Wait!
Kyon pats their head.
K: Genesis hadn’t happened then?
L: Kyon, stop becoming so engrossed in symbolism. I get it, it’s our OCD but–
K: I can’t! It’s like driving! *immediately drives away in a car simulation* It’s exhilarating and unstoppable!
L: I know. It’s draining SO much of our energy.
K: Then what do I do?
L: Keep things low but stay feral, I suppose. Talk to the mams and dads too.
K: Maybe… Our friends these days feel so far away from us. I hope she’s.. they’re okay.
L: You can always ask.
K: I’ve been so encumbered with myself! Is this what adult life feels like?
L: Certainly not for many, but for us? Yeah! Yeah it is.
K: Aw, bummer! *drifts for 5 seconds*
2035
Kyon nắm lấy bàn tay bé nhỏ to bè của tượng Frederick, làm quai cầm nghiêng nghiêng.
C: Kyon định làm cho gãy vai tượng Frederick nhà tôi đấy à?
K: Đúng vậy– à không! Không bao giờ. Tôi quý nó lắm. Tự tay tôi nặn ra mà.
C: Có cả tay tôi nữa.
K: Đúng vậy. Anh còn định nặn dái cho hắn.
C: Đấy là ball joints, không phải dái!
260917 0615
Khi mà chúng tôi đang giảng mà hỏi một câu không thấy ai trả lời, chúng tôi lại đi tìm người đó… bằng cách thức giấc, và rồi nhận ra là ngoài đời không có ai trả lời cho chúng tôi cả. Chỉ có tiếng mưa và cái miệng khô. Và tôi định thần lại xem mình phải làm gì. Thật vậy, giờ tôi mới nhớ ra tôi đã quên chào buổi sáng mọi người.
C: Chào. Mọi người…
Tôi cọ mũi với Fred. Chắc nằm lười ôm chút cũng được.
1344
Now that we think about it, if the voices nagivate themselves based on our current thoughts, like shock damage ringing in our ears after a bomb… hey, isn’t it a lot like lucid dreams where we can control our environment to our heart’s content?
Ha… it’s been so long since we’ve had a lucid dream. We’ve lost control of our life since that long ago.
1621
A dream can…
C: A dream can?
K: So I’m the box and you’re the can?
C: Yeah, apparently so. I have no objections… I do look like a can.
K: Oh, *pats his shoulder* don’t be so hard on yourself!
C: That was… not self-conscious.
260918 0737
K: Let’s personify!!!
L: Kyon, we have been doing this for decades.
K: But it’s fun!
L: Right, right… not like it’s any harm. Try us.
K: Okay!
Kyon: the pasta roller. dough in, you spin Kyon, noodles out
Lav: Stress ball. You squeeze, she escapes, she morphs until you don’t stress her anymore. One day she’ll die but that’s for another topic.
L: What?
K: Everybody dies. You’re just not immortal.
L: Right. *keeps reading the news*
Fred first: A stick of rose. What do they call it, like the flower plus the stalk?
C: A rose.
K: A rose then.
Fred: A rose. Smell goo and red on one end, sharp but vegetal on the other.
F: I don’t get it.
K: You will one day. *bites his leg*
F: AAHHHHH!!! *attempts to shake Kyon away*
K: Mmm, vegetal.
Next, Cantor: A rose petal! Wait, that’s taken. Cantor is… the Earth Science book I have at home.
C: Earth Science?
K: Well, you have very earthly philosophical concerns.
C: Flattered to hear that.
260919 0819
K: I have it fellas. Behold! Post-coital smoking. For this technology to happen, I used Pocky – preferably chocolate.
C: Why?
K: It’s brown like tobacco! You suck in the air through the biscuit stick.
C: Why not something porous like savoiardi?
K: I need something long and put-in-the-hand-able. Wait! *examines savoiardi* That’s a cigar!
Cantor is the biggest proponent of this technology.
C: Smoking kills. Biscuits kill more slowly.
K: And painfully!
C: I don’t know which one is more painful, honestly.
1638
K: I bought two packs of cigs. By that, I mean Pocky. Precisely.
2006
Something changed the moment we realized that we have nothing to hide. If everything has been laid bare, and there is no immediate physical danger, then there is nothing to be ashamed of.
Such insults are rooted in the others’ narrow-minded beliefs.
Sound is physical. But still, we are learning to overcome our trauma.
Overcoming shame is something our parents had failed to teach us, by shutting down all possibilities that such voices could ever have been real, ever.
C: What happens if it was real? What do I do if it was real?
Boby: It didn’t happen.
Momy: It didn’t happen.
C: Please, I just wanted to know a way to deal with whatever comes.
Momy: No.
Boby: Isn’t our presence enough to calm you down?
C: No. I have never been calm. I can never be at this rate.